George's Nights With Troy Lamore

It's been a beautiful day here in Catworld, the hottest day I think of the whole year. Oh how I wished I could feel the warmth on my skin but that it now a thing of the past, still I did enjoy sitting outside with Daddy and River who were both just zonked out my the heat. Poor little River panting away, when will she learn to stay out of the sun it just doesn't agree with her with all that hair.

Anyway the heat kept the cats indoors all day, they are not as big sun lovers as I am but as the heat of the day subsided George came over, sitting himself out the front where it's nice and cool.

He had a serious look on his face and said it was time for him to tell me about his night's with Troy Lamore.

Night's in the plural, so there had been more than one! I didn't want to interrupt his flow and settled down next to him, I didn't want to miss a word.

I first met Troy, he began, a long time ago way before you ever came to live here. I was much younger then and I'm ashamed to say I wasn't quiet the cat I am now.

I think he could pick up that I wasn't exactly reading through the lines, took a deep breath and continued.

Back then, I put it about a bit, I was a bit of a player and had much to learn about respect for the ladies, and I'd found myself in a bit of a pickle. I was in a relationship with Emma, but I'd managed to get Lucy pregnant.

Nannies Lucy? I interjected.

Yes, she did end up moving in with your Nan, it was the fallout from everything, she just couldn't bear to be around me anymore and it was also a condition that Emma put on us continuing to see each other. I didn't treat either one of them very well.

He looked still ashamed.

Troy first turned up just as I'd discovered that Lucy was pregnant and I was in a right state, I just didn't know how to handle any of it. I was scared stiff of Emma finding out and leaving me and Lucy's due date was getting nearer and nearer. I'd persued Emma relentlessly and finally she had given in to my advances, we hadn't chosen our time carefully and time was running out.

He turned and looked me in the eye.

It wasn't her fault, I take full responsibility.

I was out in the back garden on my own sitting under the tree when I heard a voice call out from the darkness. I hadn't heard anyone enter the garden and it gave me a bit of a start.

You OK my friend, you look like you have lots on your mind, came the voice that I later learned belonged to my dear friend Troy Lamore.

I don't know why, maybe it was because I just needed to speak to someone not connected to the situation or maybe it was because his soft voice just instigated a sense of trust that I nodded and he walked over and sat by me and I told him all about the situation.

i could totally identify with that but nothing wanting to interrupt I just nodded.

Troy listen throughout my self pitying tale of woe, half way through producing some rather lovely chicken pieces which we shared. I'd not been eating but talking everything out had suddenly made me feel hungry and I took a mouthful before continuing.

Hours I must have talked and all the time his kindly face showed the greatest interest and concern, occasionally nodding but never really saying much. I didn't feel at all judged by him and when I finished it felt like a great big weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

I asked him for his opinion and he said that he thought it best I speak to both of them and just be honest about everything. Timing was everything, that and open communication and even if things didn't turn out the way that I'd hoped it wasn't a situation that could be avoided any longer. 

I knew he was right I loved Emma and didn't want to lose her but I couldn't keep her by deception and as much as I was attracted to Lucy and had strong feelings towards her they just weren't the same.

I resolved to talk to them both the following day and get everything out in the open and Troy smiled at me. It was the right thing to do, I knew it all along but he somehow gave me the confidence to tackle it.

By this time we'd been talking most of the night and I could hear the dawn chorus. I'd been so absorbed with my own problems that I'd not even asked Troy a single question, he told me that there would be time for that but he must be off now he had a bus to catch, something about visiting some friends in Ireland and if he missed the bus he might miss his connecting ferry but he would be very grateful if I looked after an item for him and he produced an envelope.

An envelope, I wondered for a moment what that was all about but said nothing.

After all the help he had given me in clarifying things in my mind it was the least I could do and happily agreed, George continued.

I spoke to both Emma and Lucy the next day, it didn't go well I'm afraid. Emma didn't speak to me for weeks and Lucy, well as soon as she had our kittens she moved out and we never spoke again. I'd managed to break two hearts with my selfishness although over time Emma and I tried again but it was never the same and we broke up permanently a few months later. 

I only had myself to blame and I knew it but unfortunately over time I forgot the lesson and was destined to almost repeat the same thing with you and Sarah.

That was the second time that I met Troy, you had moved here and we'd been getting very close if you remember.

I remembered alright but I had forgiven George and had moved forward but still hearing it brought a little twinge to my heart. I didn't want to interrupt his flow or particularly visit old times like that, I just nodded so he knew to carry on.

Funnily enough I was sitting back under that tree thinking what on earth to do, you'd found out that I had begun to see Sarah and I was avoiding you. Funny how we can repeat the same mistakes, I guess that was my lesson to learn.

There I was feeling ashamed again when I heard him call out from the darkness.

Hello my old friend how things?

If only I'd known then what I know now I wouldn't have been surprised that just as I could do with his friendly ear and good advice he would turn up. Such kindness from a stranger that would become so ingrained in my life

Again just like before I opened up and spilled everything out about you and Sarah and what a terrible mess I'd made again and how I could kick myself for making the same mistake.

He just smiled and gave me his shoulder to lean on, I could have cried you know Lil' at the hurt I'd caused you.

It's OK, I said, that's all in the past and you know you are forgiven George, when I really needed you there you were and you mustn't beat yourself up about that anymore. 

I smiled. At least we weren't in quite the same situation.

George smiled back, I think hearing that finally put it to bed for him and he continued.

I should have known the advice he would give, it was the same as before, again communicate, talk to you both about what had been going on. Well Sarah as you know already knew and as difficult as it was I knew I needed to stop avoiding you and I did, and came and spoke to you the very next day.

The sun was beginning to come up and Troy got up, said he needed to be off he was off on an adventure, something about locating some buried treasures way over in Hawaii so it was a long trip ahead of him.

It was then as we were saying our goodbyes that I suddenly remembered the envelope he had given me all those years before. I'd kept it very safe, hidden under the sunshine shed and asked him if he would like it. He asked me to keep hold of it and that if I wouldn't mind he had another one he'd like me to look after. 

Well it was the least I could do and gladly agreed and with that he was off.

The third time he turned up was just after Christmas last year. Thankfully I hadn't repeated my mistakes from the past and so was a little surprised when I heard him call out my name. That tree will always remind me of him.

Hello old chum. Troy said as we settled down and he passed me some beef scraps he'd had upon him and he asked if I wouldn't mind getting the two envelopes he had trusted me with.

Of course I didn't and quickly ran off to get them both. Returning I passed them to him but he shook his head and asked me to open them both and read what was inside.

Lil' I was dumbfounded inside each was a letter to me and each one detailed exactly what would happen in each of those two situations with Lucy moving out and Emma eventually moving in with Mogsie and Twizzle.

The second said that you would eventually forgive me but that thing with Sarah but Sarah and I wouldn't work out but that I would learn my lesson second time around and it would take the twice to understand that no matter what communication was the key to solving life's problems. I didn't understand how he could have known everything that happened and I must admit I just stared at him open mouthed. I mean who was Troy Lamore?

Oh I could answer that one for George, but that was for a later date.

Troy smiled back and then asked if I trusted him. Of course I did he had amazed me and then handed me a third letter which I have hear for you to read but he said I wasn't to open it for exactly 30 days which I did to the day. The day after you passed!

With that he handed me the envelope and I unfolded the paper inside and began to read.

Dear George,

You find yourself in a time of great loss and sorrow for Catworld but this sorrow will soon be replaced with a time of joy, a joy that must be kept to yourself until the time comes for others to join you. I trust you have remembered the importance of communication for shortly you are to be called upon to do just that, to be the first in Catworld to communicate with the one who has gone.

I know this may sound scary but fear not dear friend for the return has been foretold and it's vital that you listen to yourself and persevere as this is not going to be an easy task but it is your task, a task of huge importance.

There's not an easy journey ahead of you, there will be trials and tribulations, just has there have been in the past which have led you to this point, but fear not the judgement's, the journeys these are ones you are destined to go on for the sake of all Catkind for The Time Is Coming!

You'll know when the time is right to tell all about our times together to the one who has gone, you'll be asked for help three times, listen out for it carefully for then you shall know that the time is right.

Remember the universe has a way of guiding us and the triumphs and the mistakes are all a part of it. Trust dear George trust that if you take a wrong turn the universe will step, in at this stage, to keep you on the right path but it will not always be like that, the ultimate outcome is not yet fixed.

You are not alone in this endeavour, others will reveal themselves when their time is right, for before you all is the greatest battle to have befallen Catkind, a battle that has been fought time and time again but now wakes once more from it's slumber .

You must work together to prevent a great evil from occurring with dire consequences for us all if you don't work together, there will be a choice to make and one will asked to be saved, the one who is trapped, make the choice carefully.

I implore you do not return to a place of great danger a third time, that is not the way, no matter how hard you are tempted or how hard one tries to persuade you for The Time Is Coming George, the time is coming for the return of The Queen of Catkind!

Great luck my friends and remember all that you have learned for you shall need to call on those lessons. Troy Lamore.


I turned to look George my eyes wide open, I could hardly believe it and certainly couldn't say it out loud so I mouthed the words - The Queen of Catkind!

He nodded back.

  

Blimey I Was Not Expecting That! - Part 3

Here I was, doing something I'd never done before, in a place I'd never been to before. I was far away from home, originally thinking I was dreaming but now I knew it couldn't be a dream as I was heading towards my man. Troy Lamore!

Down I fell into the rainbow hole. No noise no sound at all, not even the sound of air as I fell. Strangely I wasn't scared at all. Throughout all of this crazy afternoon since the moment I'd closed my eyes in the Doctors I hadn't felt frightened or in pain.

I guess that was some injection I'd received, it had certainly taken away any worry from me and now as I fell knowing that Troy was on the other side of the hole I could feel my heart once again beating.

I turned to look at the sides as I fell, the colours should be blurred the speed I was falling but they weren't. It was like everything was playing in slow motion HD. I looked up I saw a glint of that bluest of blue skies above me, a smile spread across my face.

The sky above started to look smaller and smaller with each second and I knew I must be approaching the end. As I looked down I realised I was already on the ground. How had that happened, I hadn't remembered landing?

Hey .That familiar velvet voice called out and there right next to me, there he was, my Troy Lamore.

What are you doing here and where are we? I smiled walking over to my old friend. We stood and looked at each other, I rubbed my cheek against his and gazed into his eyes, flip flop went my heart, that beating was so strong now.

Something told me you'd drop by.

With that he smiled, returned my cheek rub and we sat down. The light of the rainbow holes warm glow was fading but it was still warm, it felt like a beautiful Summer's evening. I could see him incredibly clearly

I can hardly believe you are here, I said

As ever he stood there beautiful, his fur shinning, his eyes as hypnotic as ever. I just stood and stared, transfixed in no hurry to go anywhere.

It's so lovely to see you, I said

Oh Lil' it's joyous to see you to but a bit sad too. 

Why sad? That's a curious thing to say!

All will be revealed soon my darling Lil' for now you just need to be aware that this is a deeply touching experience for me and this place will make you look at your soul. This world is big and we can, if you want. see it all.

I'd moved closer and sat next to him. It was a conscious decision, this was one man I trusted totally, there was something about him from the very first time that we met that was confirmed by every subsequent meeting. This guy was solid.

Just understand that for now it's a bitter sweet pleasure to see you Lil', 

He leaned in and stroked the side of my face. a tear in his eye.

I enjoyed being with Troy, I always felt slightly flushed but this time I was more confused and intrigued that ever. He must have been able to tell, I saw a little swallow from the back of his throat before his face broke out into that beautiful smile and he winked at me. I smiled back.

Suddenly his face changed and he looked more serious;

How's things going at home?

Pretty good, me and River are getting on very well these days, I've really grown to love her, can you believe it I love a dog?

Looks like you two have really settled into your rhythm.

I've not felt too well today though and Daddy took me to see the Doctor but I'm feeling better than ever now.

He nodded. You must be tired though! Have you travelled far?

No that's the strange thing, one minute I was with Daddy at the Doctor's and then I fell asleep and until I heard your voice I thought I was dreaming. I'm very confused. He smiled gently at me again.

Where have you just come from then? I asked

I've been visiting some monk friends of mine over in China, just hanging out listening to some fantastic chanting. 

He turned and looked at me directly in my eyes, nodding towards the rainbow hole and asked. 

How was that wind in your fur gorgeous? 

It's always amazed me how he asks lots of questions but gives very few answers I should have learnt not to ask by now but he had his ways I suppose, my mysterious man.

I smiled at him 

I'll make a deal with you, I tell you all about it and you tell me where we are, why I'm here, how you got here and who you are Troy, you always turn up when I seem to need you the most.

It would be rude of me to turn down such a deal from such a beautiful lady. I blushed again.

I knew exactly what I was doing, the mystery of Troy's appearances had for so long been an unanswered question in my mind and I felt the time was right for me to get some answers, this seemed to be a place where anything could happen. I was so glad that he was here, a broad smile spread across my face .Even though I wasn't hungry I wished I'd brought a packet of Dreamies with me.

                                                              ...............................

You can catch the warmest glow of the rainbow holes light from here, he said, patting a spot next to him, I knew the signs he was indicating that I should come closer.

Come sit a while, he said confirming my assumption. He turned and looked directly at me, a smile in his eyes and on his lips. Oh those lips, I just wanted to kiss them but didn't I always?

I sat just a little closer to him than his pat had been. I could feel the warmth of his body and the slow rise and fall as he took a breath, the glow of the rainbow hole enveloping us both.

When are you going to tell me what's going on? I asked.

I've grown stronger since meeting Troy for the first time, no longer that shy and timid little cat, confident I wasn't afraid to ask for what I wanted.

He sat there in silence looking back at me to.

How was that wind in your hair Lil'? He asked again.

I put my head down slightly embarrassed, there was a firmness in his voice that said he meant for the question to be answered first.

I couldn't stop myself, I kissed him.

He smiled. Stop avoiding the question.

I didn't know what to say, I felt scolded even though his voice didn't change in tone,  my eyes must having given something away as he smiled sweetly back at my awkwardness.

I felt strangely calm and safe and relaxed, like I didn't have a care in the world even though I was falling. It was an unusual experience, but then again nothing about this afternoon has been usual.

His left eye raised up a little and he smiled again. 

Still got that shyness about you I see Lil' and it's still a very attractive quality, he licked his paw and then mine.

*Blush* I continued, trying not to react to his previous comment, I don't know why he always makes me feel this way but he does. I wasn't flustered although my mind had gone blank, I couldn't speak.

Feeling that wind then Lil', just feeling that wind? Now you've answered my question let me answer one of yours but there's only three questions that I can answer so choose your questions wisely and I promise I shall give you your answers to anything you ask.

Is there nothing that you don't know about?

He laughed back. 

There comes a time to know and there comes a time to know. It's the whisper of that wind. So Lil' are you ready for another adventure? 

I've always jumped at the adventures on offer when Troy's around but something made me pause. My catty powers were beginning to kick in and I sensed that there was something ahead that felt different, not like before when Troy pushed me to my limits, I was nervous about what lay ahead. I still couldn't understand what I was feeling but then again it had been one of those days.

Tonight Lil' I am going to take you on a very different adventure that you can and never will forget. It's somewhere very different than we've ever been to before together and there I'll give you your answers, I promise!
                                                       ...............................

With that up we got. You ready? he asked, Let's go!

But he stayed totally still.

Go on, I said, I can keep up.

I know  he said, but we are already there.

I knew he wouldn't lie to me he'd always pushed me further than I'd ever gone before but he was saying we was already there. I hesitated, with him there were no boundaries.

Being with Troy Lamore had always given me strength to do things I'd never done before but more than ever before I didn't know where we were going or what I was doing. Usually I didn't care but this time he'd gone very mysterious, he wasn't mucking about.

A pathway suddenly appeared in front of us where there hadn't been one before.

In the distance I could see gardens and streams, beautiful tree's and multi-coloured birds and cats, lots and lots of cats.

I thought you said we were there. I turned and looked at him.

He turned to look at me. We are, he replied and I turned forward again.

I followed his gaze. Somehow we were now surrounded by all these beautiful plants and animals, rabbits playing in the fields, laughing and joking, the birds swooped all around us, the flowers perfume near knocked me over.

But we haven't even moved, how did we get here?

Remember just three questions Lil', is that your first?

No, no, hang on, let me think.

Why could he only answer three questions? I dare not ask that in case it used one of them up. I was a little out of breath, Troy just looked around.

Right I had three questions. I knew I must use them wisely. What was the most important things I needed to know? I wanted to know who Troy really was so that was definitely one of them. I wanted to know where we were, yes I wanted to know where we were and I wanted to know why I was here. Right yes, that's it, that's my three questions.

Before I could speak, he did

Do you trust me Lil'?

Always, I smiled.

Ask away? he asked.

I nodded.

Where are we?

Close your eyes Lil'  you must promise me you you'll remain calm.

I closed my eyes and nodded

You know I'd never let anything hurt you, right? 

At that moment a kind of calm came over me. He raised his paw and touched the back of my neck. The light of the rainbow tunnel glowed brighter and warmer, I focused my mind.

We are on the other side.

My mind started to run as fast as it could. The rainbow hole made a strange sound above. I could hear the gentle sound of my feet as I ran and the noise of some birds flapping their wings above, I tried not to think about it and just concentrated on what I thought was ahead.

I instantly knew what he meant, my head was all over the place. No, no, no, no, no. NO!

It's OK Lil'. It's OK he said, trying to calm me.

I opened my eyes and there we were exactly where we had been. I'd been running but I hadn't move a millimetre.

Where are we really? I asked, trying to remain calm but for the first time since I found myself on the other side of the rainbow hole I didn't feel calm, not calm at all.

I looked down and the pathway sparkled like diamonds. I didn't know what was going on, I wanted to turn around and run away as fast as I could but I knew where I was, I knew it was futile.

Troy seemed to know where we were heading with all this but I still had no idea, although maybe I didn't want to. I could sense my pathway was coming to an end and beyond that, I didn't know.

My panic began to slow down a little. I was a very long way from home and I wasn't sure that I could find my way back again on my own but I wanted to go there, really badly.

I knew that Troy would look out and protect me but this being so far from home I began to think of the Daddies and River and Nadia and Aloha. Deep breaths right deep breaths.

We're here together, pretty girl, it's OK .

Are we really here, Troy, are we really on the other side? I asked

He didn't answer but I knew he wasn't lying to me. When I had calmed down I was grateful he'd remained silent, it would have been question number 2.

Want to see some old friends he asked.

Old friends? I thought but said nothing. Sadness have enveloped me I nodded.

Come on then.

With that he took my paw and told me to close my eyes.

When you open them you'll be amongst friends.

                                                           ...............................

I opened my eyes and could not believe what I was seeing.

In front of me lay an ever ending expanse of yellow grass and green water, a blue sky and a red sun. I turned to Troy my eyes wide open, I just wasn't expecting this, I'd seen this before, the last time we met. Troy looked back me, a soft smile on his face.

I looked around again my eyes lit up, there in front of me in the field was Evie and Smokie cleaning each other like they used to do, Misty was snoozing in the sun she looked up at me and smiled.

Where do you think we are? he asked.

I turned my head around taking the sight before me again those flowers with massive blooms in purples and red and oranges were all around, so many butterflies in beautiful colours flying from bloom to bloom and I understood what they were saying.

The other side. As soon as I said those words I accepted it and became calm once more

There's nothing to be scared of! His voice soft and tender.

I'm not, I replied and I wasn't.

Look again he said the same soft tone in his voice.

In the distance on the other side of the water there was Nanny sitting and knitting, she waved over and smiled at me, two cats by her, one I recognised as Lucy and another even though we'd never met instinctively I knew was Sally, Stay Daddies first ever cat. Next to her was another man, I've never met before but again I knew it was Stay Daddies Daddy, a little white dog at his feet, ah that's the infamous Pennt. He grinned a glint of gold tooth sparkling in the sun.

My pretty little girl, shall we go nearer? It's OK. Nothing will happen to you.

The smoothness of his voice reassured me and I somehow knew I would be OK, we moved a little closer.

You've really shown great courage Lil'. You are strong now and remember I'm here, it will all be OK.

I believed him.

Just keep looking all around you Lil'.

I looked up and above I saw both the stars of the night sky and the rainbow hole yet it was bright like a Summers day. My gaze kept changing from one wondrous thing to another, this was almost unbelievable.

Are you ready for your second question?

Yes, what about my Daddies and River and Nadia and Aloha, can I go back to them again? It's beautiful here but I don't want to be without them either.

A swan silently drifted across the water, as it passed by it turned and smiled at me, it's eyes a twinkling sapphire blue. It was beautiful.

I felt his body gently rocking next to me and I turned to look at him. He gently nodded his head and brushed his cheek against mine.

We must have sat there for an hour in silence, he was deep in thought and I didn't want to disturb him..

Eventually he broke the silence. Your eyes pretty girl they sparkle like diamonds.

I swallowed and smiled.

Listen to yourself Lil' then you'll find the answer and there is an answer of that I do not lie BUT you cannot go back to what once was either. Your heart was so big that it burnt itself out, what's happened has happened and can't be changed, but you can go forward to what can be. That answer I cannot give you, that's your test, if you can remember what that heart of yours was full of you can use it as your key.

I decided to let my questioning go for a while. Daddy always says to listen to yourself you need to get into a relaxed state of mind.

We both turned back towards the water in front of us and remained silent, our shoulders gentle touching the birds singing a lullaby, Nanny blew her nose on a hanky she had hidden up her sleeve and Evie cuddled up to Smokie by her feet.

Holes, holes, nothing but holes have plagued me for such a long time, I didn't know but I had the feeling they were significant in some way, some message that I just couldn't fathom. Daddy always says start at the beginning if you've got a problem to solve. Go right back to the very start and work you're way from there and that's exactly where I was intending to go.

I loved everyone here and I loved everyone there too. Love, Daddy says, is the most powerful thing in the world and can conquer anything. I loved them from the moment we all met so love was the start, everything else if it was meant to be would fall into place.

I turned and looked at Troy, he smiled, he must have known I was already thinking of a way to understand, it's deeply enshrined in my nature.

We both stood as if to walk back towards the rainbow hole hole, neither speaking knowing our time together was shortly to come to an end but the rainbow hole was there already above us both.

It's time to go back through. I said

Do you like that kind of wind in your hair? 

Oh yes I said. I may not be able to go back to as things were but I'm not ready to leave them yet either. I know now, I understand what was happening to the cats and the owl and the rabbit who came back out of the rainbow hole before I leaped in, their souls were returning to their loved ones, to look over them and to protect them and to love them some more. I had a very different adventure ahead of me now. What could happen I knew not but different, oh yes very different it would be from before that much I was sure of. I had the courage now to face that journey. Courage I'd gained from knowing Troy Lamore.

He turned and smiled at me and nodded.

I closed my eyes and started to feel that love. I imagined little River running around causing chaos and mess wherever she went, of Nadia asleep somewhere in the garden, of Aloha swimming around in her Underwater World letting me drink from her land and of all my friends in Catworld, but most of all, most of all of my Daddies. I love them all so much I could almost smell them.

I felt a breeze begin to blow on my neck.

You have one more question Lil' Troy called out above the sound increasing around us.

With everything that had gone on I'd forgotten the question that I'd been wanting to know the answer to for so long but the sound of the breeze had now turned into a wind and I was having difficulty hearing anything but that.

I opened my eyes and looked at him, the sound getting ever louder, I shouted out above it.

Troy Lamore, who are you? 

I pretty Lil.... I'm The First!

What!?!

I could feel myself beginning to move and closed my eyes, my heart pounding.The wind now a hurricane, the noise louder and louder and up I shot like dust up a vacume...

Pop!

In less that a second I flew out the other side and into that bluest of blue skies, my eyes still tightly shut.

I was waiting to feel the sensation of falling back down but nothing, everything was quiet. I waited a moment of two before I opened my eyes.

And I'm back in the room!

There they all were my Daddies and River, they look a bit sad to me watching TV not really speaking not saying anything much, even River's quiet for a change.

Oh what they watching?

What! I've only been gone a couple of hours and yet the date in the calendar by the TV says I've been gone three days. No that can't be right!

Oh I'm so, so glad to be home. I know they can't see me but I can see them, somehow I must let them know I'm here. Um I'll have to think about that one.

I went to the back of the house and lay down amongst all the bric-a-brac. I never thought I'd be so glad to see all this old rubbish on the table. Oh they put a new plant up in the Peace Garden right under the Swinging Heart of Love, I'll have a CLOSER investigation of that tomorrow, for now I just want to sit here and enjoy being home again. Go on River jump up at the Daddies. Go on fight their feet, make them laugh. I've  missed the sound of their laughter.

Not Just My Birthday

Today is not just my birthday by a strange coincidence it's the day I gave birth to Charlie and my girls, what a time that was!

I was down visiting nanny at the time, the daddies had gone on holiday and whenever they did they always brought me down to visit nanny. Although I always miss them when they are away I loved coming to see nanny she really spoilt me, she was probably one of the worlds biggest lover of us cats and I always had lots of company, it was always a full house what with Smokey, Misty and Lucy her three companions and then with Evie and me both down here it was like a cat party.

The Daddies hadn't realised that I was as far gone as I was when they went away or I'm sure they wouldn't have left me although I couldn't have been in better hands. I've always been a svelte cat so I guess I wasn't really showing that much and they'd only cottoned on a week or so before I gave birth that I was pregnant at all.

I remember feeling it was coming on the day before and got myself ready finding a spot in the corner to settle, over where Aloha now live. Oh it was a weird experience I felt so bloated, my catty powers where telling me what was going to happen and I guess I was with the right person for the experience as nanny was clever and realised what was happening as she got ready to go to bed, so she didn't. She waited up all night with me and when it got to about 3am it all started. I had four little babies, one of them didn't make it though and nanny sat up all the time with me, giving me strokes and wiping my brow.

Oh the daddies where so excited when nanny phoned them to tell them what had happened and when they got home it wasn't possible to give me any more attention, they so loved my children. For a while they struggled over what to do with us all, we lived in a flat in London and although it was a decent size, not really ideal for the five of us so my two girls went to live with their friends mum and Charlie stayed with me at home.

My little baby who didn't make it is up in the Peace Garden along with all our departed darlings and I often go up there to remember her and my other children, it's the perfect spot, nice and peaceful and I can get lost in my thoughts. I hope Charlie and the girls are having a lovely birthday too, Happy 8th birthday kids.

The Best Mothers Day

Today is not just the day after the night before it's also a very important date, doubly important in this household.

It's Mothers Day!

I remember nanny very well I got to spend lots of time with her. If she were a cat she would have been the Cat Queen of the World she was such a lover and protector of us. Through the years many of us came to live with her and experience her special kind of love.

The first cat that was lucky to live with her searched her out when she was a little girl of about 7 a present from her own mummy and daddy. Then followed Sally, Smokie, Lucy and Misty. Evie, Charlie and I were her surrogate children too and she showered the same love on us as she did on anyone she came across.

When she passed Smokie came to live with me and Evie but I think his heart was broken as he passed himself just three months later.

It's amazing to think of the time that's passed since she was here I can hardly believe it. I know how I feel so goodness only knows how daddy does but he's just like his mum a tough, practical one and just gets on with things but I know it can't be easy. Luckily he's got Disappears around to look after him and after some hideous battle that took place with a wicked witch we now all live together in our own Land of Oz, a land full of memories.

We're luckier than most though as nanny and grandad still come and visit us. We all feel their presence around us breezes on the stairs, shadows in the kitchen, whistles from grandad and the sound of nanny clearing her throat. Little glittering hearts popping up in the most unexpected places. We've even heard Smokies little bell ringing a few times. It just goes to prove they never really leave you.

When nanny went away he found a little poem that she used to carry around after grandad went and he read it out on that day. We all love and miss her.

Memories

Though you're no longer with me

Everyday I find

In one way or another

You're back there in my mind

I might hear a piece of music

And at once my mind is stirred

Back to the treasured moment

The two of us have shared

I never try to stop them

I let them just flow through

It's just my way of spending time

Once again with you

Once Upon A Time Bridget Jones Meets Cats & Dogs

The daddies and River have been out this evening. I think they went to see the girls but I can't be sure.

Everyone's come in very tired and are just going about their business. Well I say everyone what I mean is that daddies are minding their own business River is trying to mind mine.

As annoying as I find her sometimes when I just want to be left alone I must admit I've grown very fond of her and am very protective when I think she might be upset. Who ever knew that would happen? Mind you half the things that happen around here these days I never thought would happen.

The quietness of the evening gave me a lot of time to think about how things have changed for me since moving here.

Luckily I was familiar with the area as nanny lived here and I use to come and visit with Evie and Charlie. Evie would run around and cuddle up to Smokie, Misty and Lucy just sitting there . Evie and Smokey had a special relationship and a real adoration for each other that was obvious to anyone that saw them. Neither of them sadly are here any more. Lots of things are different from those times.

Nadia's been a bit of a constant though. We both came within a year of each other and have always had a respectful and cooperative relationship we just don't fuss each other much. Charlie adored her sleeping next to her until he went.

Now of course there's River. Now that is all together another experience but we're getting there.

I've even found myself venturing out into Catworld. There's been drama's and quiet times, friendships formed and battles fought and more than a sprinkle of loves dust. It's like Once Upon A Time Bridget Jones Meets Cats & Dogs.

Whatever is next? Oh I know boiled chicken I can hear daddy at the stove now.

Cats & Dogs - The Other Side

www.riverssong.net/2013/02/what-day-it-turned-out-to-be.html

Paying Homage

Ahhh that's sweet I've just caught Emma paying homage at the Peace Garden to those that aren't with us. She walked across our garage roof, down the fence and sat by the Swinging Heart of Love.

It's a special place at the end of the garden under a lovely tree, with a little birds hideout the daddies put up, full of bright flowers and little plants where the daddies and I go to think of those that have gone before; Sally, Smokie, Evie, Misty, Lucy and Penny the Jack Russell. It's the first place Nadia runs to when she escapes out the backdoor.

I didn't think that anyone else knew about our special place but I guess Emma is a bit more in tune with vibrations than I thought. Even though they are still with us somewhere I also go there to think of my girls and Charlie wherever they may be, I do miss them sometimes.